Tips for Parents & Caregivers About the Value of Sportsmanship

Participating in sport is not only a fun way to increase your and your family’s level of physical activity, it’s also about being a good sport!

Good sportsmanship is when teammates, opponents, coaches and officials treat each other with respect. It starts with something as simple as shaking hands with opponents before a game and includes acknowledging good plays made by others, as well as accepting bad calls gracefully.

It can be tough to congratulate the opposing team after losing a close or important game, but the kids who learn how to do it will benefit in many ways and as a parent or caregiver, you can help.

Kids learn the basics of sportsmanship from the adults in their lives, especially parents, caregivers and coaches.

Kids who see adults behaving in a sportsmanlike way gradually come to understand that the real winners in sports are those who know how to persevere and to behave with dignity, whatever the outcome of the game.

Adults who emphasize good sportsmanship see winning as just one of several goals they’d like their kids to achieve. They help young athletes take pride in their accomplishments and in improving their skills, so that the kids see themselves as winners, even if the scoreboard doesn’t show the numbers going in their favour.

The best coaches – and parents – encourage their kids to play fair, have fun, and to concentrate on helping the team while polishing their own skills.

Tips for Growing a Good Sport

Be your child’s role model.
Actions speak louder than words and your behaviour during practices and games will influence your child more than any pep talk or lecture you give them.

Applaud good plays, no matter who makes them.
Offer praise and encouraging words for all athletes, including your child’s opponents.

Focus your attention on fun and learning new skills rather than the outcome with comments like, “That was a great play you made in the first period!” or “You sure look like you’re having fun out there!”

Keep your comments positive.
Never openly berate, tease, or demean any child athlete, coach or referee while attending a sporting event. Even when you’re watching sports on TV with your child, don’t criticize or condemn athletes’ performances.

Look for examples of good sportsmanship in professional athletes and point them out to your child. Talk about the bad examples too, and why they upset you.

Capitalize on ‘teachable moments’.
When watching events like the Olympics or professional sport, ask your child their opinion of:

• players who showboat and taunt their opponents;
  
• the costs to the team of a technical foul or being ejected from a game for unsportsmanlike conduct; and
  
• the appropriate behaviour of opposing players toward one another after a game.
  

Try to listen more than you talk or lecture.

Know the right way and time to speak your mind.
If you have a serious concern about the way that games or practices are being conducted, or if you’re upset about other parents’ behaviour, discuss it privately with your child’s coach or with a league official.

As well, if a coach is ignoring, allowing or encouraging poor sportsmanship, you need to make your objections known to that coach in a private discussion.

You set the agenda.
The emphasis on winning or losing ultimately rests with you. When you’re talking to your child after a competition, it’s important not to dwell on who won or lost.

Instead, you might ask your child, “How did you feel you did during the game?” If your child mentions that he or she didn’t do well at a particular skill, like throwing or catching, offer to work on these skills with your child before the next game.

Be honest with yourself.
Remember it’s your child who’s playing, not you. Do you want your child to play sports because it’s what you like to do or because you want your child to enjoy pleasurable social activities that help develop a better sense of self-worth, skills and sportsmanship?

Don’t push your child. As your child gets older let him or her choose the sport they want to play, and allow them to determine the level of commitment they want to make to it.

Keep your perspective and have fun!
Even if your child’s team loses every game of the season, it’s unlikely to ruin his or her life or chances of success as they grow older.

Your child may not be the star, but you can enjoy the game while you remember all the benefits your child is gaining by participating in sports – new skills, new friends, and attitudes that can help him or her all through life.

For more information on being a good sport and on Fair Play, you can visit the following websites:

www.truesportpur.ca – the website of ‘True Sport’, a growing Canadian movement that recognizes and promotes the life skills and values derived from community sport; and
www.coach.ca – the website of the Coaching Association of Canada; look for the tips on Fair Play.

[Sources: KidsHealth/The Nemours Foundation 1995-2006; Pearson Education 2002-06]